In the Arms of An Angel
by Elizabeth Gamgee
Summary: Beast Boy is open about his feelings for Raven. Raven is in denial. While on a mission, Raven regrets not telling him she's in love with him. I have no beta so all mistakes are mine. This is Very, Very loosely based off the song "In the Arms of An Angel" by Sarah Maclachlan. REVIEWS ARE LOVE!


It had been a typical day in Titans Tower. Starfire was baking some gross alien concoction; Robin was pretending to clean his tool belt while watching her. Cyborg was down in the garage repairing and modifying his car for the umpteenth time and Beast boy was with me, harassing me. I've known he's in love with me since the Teen Titans started, only because he won't shut up about it. It started with light flirting, and then uncalled for hugs, and NEVER leaving me alone. I like alone, alone protects me, If I'm alone, I can't hurt anybody. You see, with my powers, if I feel any emotion too strongly, I could make the whole building explode without thinking about it. That's why he's so dangerous. He makes me FEEL. Not only feel, but feel happy and safe. I try to shut him out; I've said and done horrible things to him for his own protection. I don't want to hurt him, and that scares me. I shut myself away in my room and put protection charms on my door so no one can get in; I wish I could have done the same to my heart. After a while I didn't push him away when he hugged me, and even hugged him myself a couple times. I never told him how I felt, or even that I did. But now I wish I had; he deserves that.

He had been sitting on my bed, listening to me read poetry. He slipped closer to me and took my hand gently away from the book and held it. I looked at his face and then took my hand away coldly. He looked away and chuckled nervously "Sorry" he mumbled. I picked up the book again and, in an instant, he was sitting next to me instead of across from me. I tried to ignore the sudden closeness and keep reading but then I felt his lips on my cheek. They were so gentle I almost didn't notice it. I turned my face toward his as he placed his hand on my cheek. I tried to be angry at him but didn't get a chance before his lips were on mine. Almost immediately my lamp exploded and my window shattered. I drew away quickly and he reached his hand out "Raven!" he shouted. I was about to respond until the alarm sounded, indicating trouble in the city. I ran out of the room without telling him how the kiss really made me feel.

It was Slade that did it. One of the most dangerous criminals we've ever faced as a team. Just one dagger was enough to take away my chance to tell Beast Boy how I felt about him. Everything went in slow motion as I saw him fall to his knees and cry out. Robin, our leader, went after Slade and I just froze; watching the scene play out. He cried out again, but I couldn't quite tell what he was saying. I went to him and extended my hand to touch his shoulder in comfort but when I did, I noticed that the sleeves of my uniform were white. Wait….wasn't I wearing my usual black outfit? What's going on? I looked down at Beast Boy again and saw something in his arms.

I came closer to Beast Boy and his words became clearer to me "Raven! No!" What did he mean? I'm right here. I came close enough to touch him so I could reassure him that I was unharmed but when I went to touch him, I phased through him. A sudden rush of panic overwhelmed me and I tried desperately to calm down so that nothing got destroyed. I couldn't calm down, but nothing was happening. A rush of emotion like I'd never felt before crashed over me and I just let it happen. I quickly ran to try to get his attention and that's when I noticed it; my body, bloody and still. My eyes widened in horror. How could this have happened? I reached out to him desperately trying to get his attention and tell him I was all right but I couldn't seem to touch him.

'Calm down, Raven.' I thought to myself 'If you calm down, maybe you can touch him.' I tried to focus. I concentrated as hard as I could, reached out my hand (just like he had done earlier that day), and touched his cheek. The concentration exhausted me and "I love you" was the last thing I thought before all I knew was darkness.

When I "woke up" I was confused and disoriented. I didn't know where I was until a blindly beautiful light cam towards me. I covered my face until the light dimmed and I looked to where I had seen it. In its place stood someone I never thought I would see again. My mother stood in front of me, in white robes and a dove on her arm. I was overwhelmed with emotion and I ran to her to embrace her and if it was possible for me to, I'm sure I would have cried. "Mother" I whispered "What happened?"

"It was your time little bird" she said calmly.

I pulled away slightly "Beast Boy" I gasped "Where is he? I have to make sure He's all right!"

"Patience, child" said my mother.

"Mother I—" I hesitated "I love him"

My mother smiled gently and stroked my hair "I know, child. You will be able to tell him one day"

"You mean I can come back?" I asked

"No. But the dead can interact with the living and because one of your powers in life was astral projection, I believe you may be able to appear to him as well." She replied

"I want to see him now" I said, with urgency.

"Just look around, child." She said. Not knowing what she meant, I looked around the place where we were and realized I was in Titans Tower, in Beast Boy's room. He was on the bed, sobbing openly, and I wasn't afraid to let my heart break. I ran to him in an attempt to give him peace but again, my hand phased through him.

"Why can't I touch him?" I asked in frustration.

"You're not ready." Said my mother "But you can let him know you are here."

Without looking away from Beat Boy's tear streaked face I said "How?"

My mother approached my side and said "Think about how much you love him, what he means to you and that feeling will cross over to him and he will know it's from you."

I thought deeply about how much I love him and I felt warmth spreading though my heart as I finally let myself feel how much I loved him. I wasn't sure how long I thought about it until suddenly I heard a broken voice say "Raven….?" I smiled brightly when he acknowledged me. He sat up on the bed and looked around the room. I sat beside him and, after concentrating hard, I grabbed his hand in mine. He gasped and I began to speak, knowing he couldn't hear me. "I love you, I'm sorry I never told you." I looked down in embarrassment "You deserved so much better than me. I was cruel and harsh to you, because I was afraid to let you in." I grasped harder "I'm going to try to make it up to you. I can't be with you physically but you will never be without me." I dared to do more and touched his forehead with mine "You're in the arms of the angels now, may you find some comfort here" I thought long and hard about how much I loved him and I think he felt it because although he was crying, I saw a bittersweet smile appear as he lay back down on the bed.

I was beginning to lose 'consciousness' and as I began slipping away from him, I think he felt it. "I love you too, Raven…" was the last thing I heard.


End file.
